Friday, March 7, 2014

Where we are

Diane had requested that I write about how things are going within our dynamic. Thank you Diane.

 Well thats kind of a loaded topic at the moment. Some of you may remember back in January when clyde presented me with a contract to be my Master. I agreed to give it a 3 month trial period and then reevaluate. We're nearing the end of our agreement and I assume a very serious discussion is in our near future.

Where are we?

Well things are good. We play a lot. The drive by has become a regular occurrence. We've added some new toys to our box. One of them is the much anticipated butt plug. (Love it) He's become very creative with his seductive games. Bottom line, we are having fun and really good sex.

But of course like every relationship we have bad days. There's not much consistency and it leaves me wondering what is really important to him. (Not a good place to be)  I have become a little more defiant than usual. He's not sure how to handle that just yet. (He doesn't like punishment but he likes for me to obey.)

I'm wondering if I'm cut out to be a slave. Maybe that's not for me. I am realizing that I have power in this relationship. A lot. And I like it. I don't want to give that up. Not completely.

I know that I am submissive. I love submitting to my husband. Nothing turns me on more than seeing him in control. He just does it for me. But at the same time, I don't want to push him to be someone he's not. I'm trying my best to let him lead and find HIS way with this.

At this point I'm really happy with the way things are going. He still spanks me. We still have hot and kinky sex. But most of all, we have that reconnection back.

So that's where we are. Still chugging along raising a family, attending school functions, and playing kinky games behind closed doors.

15 comments:

  1. I've missed seeing you around but I am glad things are going ok.

    Hugs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've missed being around. Thank you.

      Hugs

      Delete
  2. It is good to reflect and know what works and what doesn't for you. Glad everything is going well. Hugs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. Sometimes you have to pause and take stock to realize what you need to work on. It certainly helps put thing in perspective.

      xo

      Delete
  3. Thanks for answering my question Bonnie :) I so glad to hear you and Clyde are doing so well. I like the idea of the daily drive by. Wonder if that would work for Jack and me? You have some of the same anxieties as I do. I'm worried about pushing Jack too far too fast I know I should let him find himself but I'm so impatient. But you do make me feel better. It's nice to know I'm not alone.
    hugs
    Diane

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is hard to be patient when you know what you want but its so important to let him play catch up and work it out for himself. Sounds like Jack is doing a fine job of keeping up with you.

      Delete
  4. Good to know all is well.
    Three months isn't very long, I think you should make the trial the rest of your life :)
    It doesn't matter what it is M/s, D/s, whatever, make it what works for you two.
    hugs
    DF

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you're right. I'm realizing that 3 months probably is not enough time to even get our feet wet. We are a work in progress.

      xo

      Delete
  5. Hi Bonnie, glad to hear you and Clyde are doing well and having lots of fun :) Three months isn't long and you are still finding your feet (so to speak) and figuring out what works for you.

    Hugs,
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Its funny, I thought 3months would be plenty of time to decide if this was for us, but you're right, its barely any time at all. We will continue on this path until one of us says otherwise. Its definitely a learning experience for us both.

      xo

      Delete
  6. Sounds like you are both finding your way (in your own time) to a beautiful equilibrium ava x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are. I can't deny that there have been some very positive changes in us both since embarking on this journey.

      xo

      Delete
  7. I think it's great that you guys are willing to shake explore and try new things. You never know what does and doesn't work without giving things a try. And it sounds like you're having a great time in the process!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are having fun with experimenting. I just want to try it all and then decide if its for us.

      xo

      Delete
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